What does family mean to you?

***WARNING: Total Stream of Conscience writing ahead****

I was out for a jog on this GLORIOUS, SUNNY day (which, in the Pacific Northwest is rare in October) and I was listening to the radio and the radio host went on and on about how his family annoyed him and he moved far away from them because he couldn't handle them.  He recently got married and his in-laws live close by and he said he is annoyed with them, too.  So he wants to move, but the wifey says "Hell, no.".

It got me to thinking about my own family.  I have very interesting family dynamics.  My parents divorced when I was around 5.  They got along for the sake of the kids, but there were some rough patches.  My moms side of the family is boisterous, fun, wild....basically an Italian American family.  My dads side is similar, except the white version. ;)  Mom's side eats all the food and drinks all the wine.  Dads family drinks all the wine and throws all the food.

My parents are both remarried and get along remarkable well.  In fact, my Step Mom and my Mom are very similar in personality and when they get together it is quite funny.

Sometimes my family annoys me.  Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to live in a different state.  But then I get sad.  No matter how much my family annoys me, I can't imagine not having them there.  My brothers mean the world to me.  My Sister In Laws and my Step Sister ARE my family.  My cousins are like my siblings.  Heck, even my third cousins, once removed are my cousins and we are close!

Sure, there are some family members who drive me up the wall.  Some whose choices in life I question.  But I believe that blood is thicker then water and I stand by them.  I may not agree with their choices, but I still am there when they fall.

And then the whole in laws thing comes into play.  My In laws are not a lot like my family.  They are more reserved and have different traditions then my family, as to most families.  But the first time I met them 8 years ago, I realized that they are truly good people at heart.  I am lucky.  I love my In laws.  In fact, I really don't like that word "In laws" because it seems to have a negative tone to it.  I call them my family.  Because they are!  They may be different then what I am used to but in the end, we all love each other and support each other and that is what matters.

I know there are very different family dynamics and some families are truly bad.  If there is drug/alcohol abuse or if there is physical or emotional abuse, then I totally get why you have to separate yourself from that. I don't have the patience or tolerance for parents who hurt their children in any way.  But personality clashes?  I don't agree with that.

In this world, you need to learn how to deal with different types, even in family.  It comes down to respecting your elders (which I think is a lost expectation in kids these days) and being tolerate of differences.

We are losing this in our kids.  They are told to be free to think whatever they want, which in a sense, I agree with.  Let your children have their individuality and let them be creative but that doesn't mean you don't teach manners, respecting authority and being tolerant.

Ok, off my soap box.  I had to get that off my chest!